Transformers Huminated: Garbage In, Garbage Out
by TheWeasel027
Summary: A trash pile brought to life, named Wreck-Gar, runs around Detroit causing trouble for Humanformer Autobot and Decepticon alike. And little does he know that he is carrying a canister of nanobots that will devour all of Detroit.
1. I Am Who Now?

Letter From The Author: Sorry about disappearing for so long. I have seriously been going on an emotional roller coaster since my mom left for Iraq. Oh, and I lengthened the "I am—!" scene for no other reason than I just _really_ wanted to. _That_, and the fact that I'd written the scene during a road trip out of sheer boredom and just adlibbed. Anyway, hope you guys likes it.

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"_Something is truly rotten in the city of Detroit. Trash-bots all over town are malfunctioning due to a contract dispute between city hall and Sumdac Systems. Acting chairman, Porter C. Powell, had this to say:_

"'_Until this contract is settled, Sumdac Systems is _not_ required to service this city's trash-bots.'_

"_In the mean time, garbage is piling up, and tempers are flaring up all over Detroit."_

"I believe Detroit is in need of a new approach to waste management," Powell clicked off the television then turned his chair to face the two Sumdac Systems scientists "Dazzle me." One scientist dumped a pile of garbage onto the freshly polished floor. The second poured an orange serum onto the pile.

"As you can see, we've managed to work out the kinks in Professor Sumdac's old nanotechnology," a scientist said. The orange serum dissolved the garbage. "Repurposing these old nanobots into trash consuming microbots. And the _best_ part is: we can manufacture these at a _fraction_ the cost of the old trash-bots! Gehuhu."

"And charge the city even more for them. I'll make a tiny little profit and be a _hero_ to boot."

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The Auto-Rover drove backwards to the garbage scow. Optimus pressed a button causing the dump-truck trailer attached to the rover to dump most of the trash onto the small boat. Then, some rather stubborn garbage got stuck and blocked off the rest of the trash. Prowl, Bulkhead, and Bumblebee then started pushing the trash out.

"This is even _less_ dignifying than repairing space bridges," Prowl lamented, "Not to mention extremely unpleasant to the nostrils."

"Not only that," Sari said, "It _smells_ bad."

"Well that may be," Optimus stepped out of the rover, "But this is still a good opportunity to mend some strained Earth-Autobot relations."

"Yeah, who knows? Once they start trusting us again, they may even start liking us again too," Bumblebee said optimistically. Meanwhile, Ratchet used his magnetizers to lift any metal out of the garbage pile. Amongst the trash was an old, red car.

"HEY THAT'S MA CAR!" an old, short man shouted at Ratchet, "Put it down _now_!"

"Yeah, yeah," Ratchet sighed. He turned off the magnetizer causing the car to plummet into the water.

"You…you…! You're gonna pay for that! Ya lousy alien! Ya gonna pay I swear!"

"Hey!" Ratchet stomped his foot, "_YOU'RE_ the one who parked your car under a trash heap!"

"Now listen up ya overgrown idiot! That trash wasn't there when I parked it!"

Ratchet used his magnetizer to wrap two metal bars around his legs and lift him up, "And _how_ is that _my_ fault?!"

"HEY! YOU PUT ME DOWN NOW! I KNOW MA RIGHTS! AND I'M CALLIN THE COPS!"

"Maybe liking us is too much to ask with Ratchet around," Bumblebee sighed.

"You! Quit harassing the Autobot!" Fanzone pointed at the old man, "You put down the citizen!" Ratchet reluctantly set the man down and removed the pipes. "The city will cover the damages to your vehicle sir. Now I suggest you go about your business."

"This isn't over!" the old man barked. Ratchet merely raised a brow then flashed his magnetizer. The old man then ran off.

"And you, my Autobot friend, could stand to work on yer people skills," Fanzone suggested.

"There's nothing wrong with my people skills!" Ratchet retorted.

"Ya know, you're starting to make Fanzone look like the friendly one," Sari commented.

"HEY!" Fanzone and Ratchet said at once.

"Sari's right Ratchet," Optimus said, "No amount of good deeds can make up for a bad attitude. I think it might be a good idea for someone to work with you on projecting a more pleasant disposition."

"I pity the poor fool who gets stuck with _that_ job," Bumblebee giggled with Sari. The laughs suddenly died. "He means us doesn't he?"

"What are _you_ smiling at?" Sari demanded from Prowl.

"Apparently there is _one_ job less dignifying than hauling trash," Prowl responded.

"And it looks like _that_ job is at capacity," Optimus said, "Let's roll on home." Optimus, Bulkhead, and Prowl then walked away. Bumblebee looked from Sari to Ratchet and ran to the rover. Ratchet walked to the rover. Sari stayed behind.

"Will you get in already?!" Ratchet demanded.

"Ah ah. What's the magic word?" she smiled.

"_NOW_!"

"It's gonna be a _long_ day," Sari sighed. She stepped onboard the rover. Then, the Auto-Rover drove off.

Not long after they left, the garbage pile on the scow glowed in bright, blue energy. A beam of light shot upward. The trash started to move and gather. The AllSpark fragment was soon surrounded by garbage which made itself into a human-form. Wire, spaghetti, and string formed long curly hair. Discarded buttons formed eyes. Soon, the trash had formed a human figure. The figure stood up, dripping in garbage. He shook himself like a dog, shaking off the trash, and revealing the newly formed man.

"I am—!" he began, but stopped, "Uhh, what am I?" He reached into the large metal "backpack" bin on his back and pulled out a nutrition label. "Oh yeah! Uh, I am High-Fructose-Corn-Syrup-Partially-Hydrogenated—No that doesn't sound right." He threw away the label and pulled out a cereal box.

"I am Good-Source-Of-Vitamin-D-And-Part-Of-A-Balanced-Breakfast! No that's not it either." He threw the box away and pulled out a microphone.

"Is this thing on?" He tapped it, threw it away, and pulled out a pizza. He looked around and took a bite of it.

"Yech, I hate mushrooms," he sighed and threw it away. He pulled out a bra. He looked at it confusingly and placed it on his head then threw it away.

"Eh, not my size." He pulled out a roll of tissue paper and squeezed it. He rubbed it against his cheek and tossed it away. He saw some flies buzzing around his head.

"Can any of you tell me who I am?" He couldn't hear what they were saying so he pulled out a hearing horn and placed it in his ear.

"Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Buzzy, buzzy, buzz buzz. Well that just sounds ridiculous." He tossed away the hearing horn. He pulled out a chainsaw and looked at it once again curiously. He pulled the cord. The chainsaw roared to life. The man yelped and threw it into the lake.

"Can't anyone tell me who I am?! All I need is a SIGN!" he screamed to the heavens. Just then the sky answered him, and a blimp flew by displaying an advertisement for the Detroit Police. The man read it aloud.

"'Detroit Metropolice Department. We're Here To Help.' Sounds good to me!" he cheered and skipped out of the junk pile onto the docks. He ran off and began his search for the Metropolice.


	2. I Am WreckGar

"Ah, I'm picking up a new AllSpark energy signature my liege!" Lugnut called to Megatron.

"No doubt another fragment has surfaced," Megatron concluded, "Retrieve it at once Lugnut. Before the Autobots get their filthy hands on it."

"Death itself cannot deter from your grand and glorious plan oh wise and noble Megatron!" Lugnut cheered.

"Just…! _Go_…" Megatron's eye twitched angrily.

"Yes my liege!" Lugnut scurried out of the mine and flew towards Detroit.

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The trash-man walked through the streets of Detroit following the large blimp.

"Move it ya worthless wreck!" a man's car skidded out of the way.

"Outta the way ya walkin pile-a-garbage!" another man just barely avoided hitting the trash-man. Trash-man looked down the street at the Angry Archer being chased by the Metropolice.

"For sooth! Thou sheriffly knave shall ne'er catch the Angry Archer!" he cheered with two filled sacks in his hands. He ran past the trash-man who stepped in the way of the cop car. The car then skidded out of the way and slammed into a streetlight sending pieces of the car flying. The trash-man picked up the car door.

"'Detroit Metropolice,'" he read, "Help at last!" He yanked a lieutenant out of the car by his collar and held him a foot off the ground. "Uh, hi. I was hoping you could tell me who I am. I mean, you _are_ here to help right?"

"You are interfering in police business," the lieutenant said, "Please disperse!"

"Good show oh dilapidated delinquent!" the Archer cheered, "Now kindly dispose of yon interloping law enforcement and leave us make our getaway!"

"Right! Dispose," trash-man let the policeman drop to the ground, "And get away!" He then ran towards Archer, grabbed him by the leg, and dragged him down the road. "I don't suppose _you_ can tell me who I am, funny, green man?"

"_You_, are my…partner in crime! They call me, the Angry Archer."

"They call me, the 'Worthless-Wreck-Walking-Pile-Of-Garbage.'"

"Oh really, bit of a mouthful. Perhaps we should just call you 'Wreck-Gar' for short."

"Wreck-Gar…" Wreck-Gar sighed happily.

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"Move it already! Don't you people have anything better to do?!" Ratchet barked at the traffic jam.

"You really should try to be more patient with people," Sari suggested.

"I'd be a lot more patient with them. If they'd just get outta my way!"

"Take a chill-pill doc. That's why we built this," Bumblebee pressed a button on the control panel. The Auto-Rover's roof-mounted emergency siren flared. Some cars moved out of the way and cleared a path.

"Now _that's_ more like it," Ratchet smirked.

"Aren't you kinda missing the point about acting friendlier to people?" Sari asked.

"They can't exactly see me _smile_ behind a two-way mirror now can they?"

"Somebody help me!" a man ran onto the road in front of the rover. "My wife is about to have a baby and our car broke down! We need to get to a hospital right away!"

"What do I look like? A taxi service?!"

"_This_ is an emergency," Sari reminded, "Not to mention a chance for you to practice acting _friendlier_."

"That's gonna be _some_ acting job," Bumblebee said.

"Shut it and open the back door," Ratchet said. Bumblebee nodded and opened the back door. He led the man and woman to some seats.

"Remember, the most important thing is to keep the mother calm," Sari said.

"CALM?! Why _wouldn't_ she be _calm_?!" Ratchet demanded. The rover skidded to a start and sped away.

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"Okay, let's try this _one_ more time. Shall we?" Angry Archer rubbed his temples. Wreck-Gar nodded. "We _steal_ from the rich. And give to the poor. Namely ourselves."

"I am Wreck-Gar! I steal from the rich!" Wreck-Gar snatched the Archer's jewels and tossed them into his backpack.

"Give me back those jewels."

"Okay!" He pulled out some screwdrivers, wrenches, and hammers.

"Not tools! _Jewels_."

"Okay!" Wreck-Gar pulled out a handful of spools and let them pour on Archer's head.

"Those are _spools_. I want _jewels_! You know? Those _sparkly_ things."

"Righty-o!" Wreck-Gar handed Archer a lit stick of dynamite.

"NO!" Archer yanked it out of his hand and put out the fuse. "What ho?" Archer looked out the alley to see an armored car approaching. "Our query approacheth. Now help me knock over yon armored coach."

"I am Wreck-Gar! I knock things over!" Wreck-Gar stood up, pulled out a large barbell, and charged out of the alley and after the armored car.

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The Auto-Rover sped through the streets and skidded through corners sending all its passengers rolling across the floors.

"Honey?" the woman asked, trying to maintain her own sanity, "Could you _please_ tell the driver to SLOW DOWN?!"

"WILL YOU TWO KEEP IT DOWN?!" Ratchet demanded, "I'm trying to figure out which one of these buildings is a 'hospital.'"

"What's going on?!" the man shouted, "Are you people all MAD?!"

"Let! Us! OUT! _NOW_!!!" the wife demanded.

"Way to calm 'em down Ratchet," Sari commented.

"Will you two pipe down?! There is absolutely NOTHING to panic about!" Ratchet barked. Just then, a crazy man holding a large barbell ran up behind an armored truck, smacked it on its side a couple times, and then ran in front of it. He stood firmly, stared at the truck determinedly, and then grabbed the truck by its grill and threw it down the road.

"Except that…" Ratchet turned the rover just in time to avoid the truck's crash landing. The rover skidded to a halt. "There. What did I tell you? We're perfectly safe."

"That guy doesn't look too 'safe' to me," Bumblebee pointed at the man who was running down the street towards them.

"I am Wreck-Gar!" Wreck-Gar ran past the rover and to the truck, "I knock things over!" Wreck-Gar then started smacking the armored car with his barbell. Ratchet and Bumblebee jumped out of the rover.

"So you wanna play _rough_ do ya?!" Ratchet challenged.

"Huh?" Wreck-Gar's barbell was magnetically lifted out of his hands and thrown down the street. It just barely avoided hitting the couple who were now shaking in terror.

"I don't know much about these things, lady, but I think you're supposed ta breath or something," Sari said. Before Bumblebee and Ratchet could take on Wreck-Gar, the Angry Archer's magnetic arrow snatched away a canister out of the armored car.

"I knoweth not what this reciprocal contains, but me thinks it must be valuable," Archer said, "Now give them everything you've got!"

"Right! Everything I've got!" Wreck-Gar began throwing random items from within his backpack at the Autobots. "Here, have this toilet! And! This engine block!" Ratchet avoided the toilet, but was knocked down by the engine block, "How about a nice boiled side of beef?" Bumblebee caught the beef and used it to bounce away the rest of his "gifts."

"Ratchet, you get the others to the hospital. I'll take care of the junk-man," Bumblebee said.

"Since when do _you_ give the orders kid?!" Ratchet demanded.

"We're Autobots. We're supposed to protect life remember?"

"Don't tell me how to protect life! I've been protecting life since before you were born!"

"Autobots? Protect life?" Wreck-Gar curiously observed, "Right!" Wreck-Gar ran to the couple. "Greetings life! I am Wreck-Gar! Wreck-Gar the Autobot!" Wreck-Gar pulled an Autobot insignia out of his backpack and slapped it on his chest, "I will protect you!" The two screamed in terror.

"We're supposed to be working on our people skills! Remember?!" Bumblebee retorted.

"You're also supposed to catch the bad guy!" Sari reminded. Wreck-Gar overheard Sari and looked at the Archer swinging away.

"Right! Catch bad guy!" Wreck-Gar ran after the Archer. Bumblebee and Sari ran after Wreck-Gar.

"Well don't just sit there," Ratchet looked angrily at the couple, "You still want that ride or what?!"

"We'll call a cab!" they said at once.

"Hmph. Not even a thank you. And they call _me_ rude."


	3. I Am A Hero

The Angry Archer swung down the street using his arrows with Wreck-Gar hot on his trail. Riding a pogo-stick to go twenty feet into the air…

"I am Wreck-Gar the Autobot!" Wreck-Gar jumped in front of the Archer just as he came down from his swing and slammed into him. Wreck-Gar landed on the ground with the Archer in his arms. "Must catch the bad guy!" Wreck-Gar threw the Archer high into the air causing him to drop the canister and land in Wreck-Gar's backpack. "He's going! Going!" As the Archer was coming down, he grabbed onto a flag pole, fired an arrow, and swung away.

"Nungh, now how'm I supposed to catch him?" Wreck-Gar complained.

"What are you?" Bumblebee breathed, "What is he?"

"I dunno, but he's givin' off a ton of AllSpark energy," Sari answered. Her key glowed brightly in response.

"I am Wreck-Gar! I give off a ton of AllSpark energy!" Wreck-Gar then began to glow himself.

"So what? An AllSpark fragment brought some junk pile to life and made some new kind of Autobot?!" Bumblebee exclaimed.

"I am Wreck-Gar! I am some new kind of Autobot?!"

"Listen up you," Ratchet walked up to Wreck-Gar and ripped off his Autobot symbol, "You're not an Autobot and never will _be_ an Autobot. You're only good for one thing: GARBAGE!"

"I am Wreck-Gar! I am only good for one thing: GARBAGE! I must deliver garbage to all!" Wreck-Gar pulled off his backpack and dumped a huge pile of garbage on the other three. He then ran down the street dumping a trail of trash along the way.

"You _just_ have a way with words. Don't ya?" Sari said sarcastically.

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"The AllSpark energy signal is spiking!" Lugnut exclaimed. He scanned the street below and saw a man running down the street dumping huge amounts of trash. "That scum is not worthy to carry Megatron's AllSpark fragment!"

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"Garbage for all! Come and get your garbage! Only slightly used!" Wreck-Gar ran into a military base. Lugnut jumped off a building and slammed a huge mace into the ground.

"Earthling! The AllSpark fragment! NOW!" Lugnut demanded.

"No 'earthling' here. I am Wreck-Gar! I am only good for one thing: GARBAGE!"

"Are you…an Autobot?"

"I am Wreck-Gar! I am not an Autobot and never _will_ be an Autobot."

"So you…you must be a Decepticon!"

"I am Wreck-Gar! I must…be a Decepticon!" Wreck-Gar slapped a Decepticon symbol onto his chest.

"OH! ALL HAIL MEGATRON!" Lugnut cheered to the sky.

"All hail Megatron!" Wreck-Gar cheered with a stop sign in his hand, "Uh, wh-what's a Megatron?"

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Ratchet magnetically ripped off the armored car's door and lifted up the driver who was struggling.

"Will you hold still?!" Ratchet barked, "Uh-I mean- are you alright sir?" Ratchet forced a smile. Bumblebee and Sari smiled. Considering it was Ratchet they were dealing with, they felt like they'd just pulled off a miracle. Sari then saw a white and red limo pull up. Porter C. Powell stepped out.

"What are _you_ doing here," Sari growled.

"That's one of _my_ trucks. It was delivering a canister of trash-eating microbots to be demonstrated for the mayor when the driver tripped the silent alarm," Powell answered.

"Well it looks like he was too late Mr. Powell. Your sample's gone," Fanzone said.

"I've got a pretty good idea who's got it," Bumblebee said.

"Hello? Powell kicked my outta my home. Remember? Why should we do him any favors?" Sari stubbornly reminded.

"Because microbots and an AllSpark fragment can't possibly mean anything good," Ratchet told them.

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"Okay then, that trail of trash says we're on the right track. And my key says we're close," Sari told Ratchet. Ratchet nodded and turned a right into a military base. Wreck-Gar stood at the center.

"Hello!" he greeted, "Would you like some garbage?"

"Just hand over the microbots and nobody gets hurt," Bumblebee said.

"Sure thing. Uh, one second," Wreck-Gar searched through his backpack, "Microphone. Microscope. Ooo, microfiber!"

"Listen up you worthless, smelly hobo!" Ratchet shook Wreck-Gar by his shoulders. Lugnut dropped down from the sky next to Ratchet.

"That is no way to address a servant of the great and wise Megatron!" Lugnut raised a fist and transformed it into his Punch of Kill Everything. He held the pressure pad close to Ratchet's face. Wreck-Gar stared at it curiously.

"Ah!" he suddenly exclaimed, "The universal greeting!" Wreck-Gar stood at attention, raised his left hand, and began the recital, "Bah weep. Gragnah wheep," he made two hand gestures. "Ni ni bong!" He held his hand out in a high-five and moved it towards Lugnut's punch.

"LOOK OUT!" Ratchet grabbed Sari and ran away from the base followed closely by Bumblebee. A huge explosion ripped through most of the military base. Lugnut and Wreck-Gar emerged from the rubble.

"Gah! Those accursed Autobots will pay for their insolence!" Lugnut shouted.

"Right!" Wreck-Gar pulled out a cash register with steaming meat inside it, "Cash, check, or charbroiled?"

"ATTACK!" Lugnut smacked the register out of his hand.

"Which kind of tack would you like?" Wreck-Gar pulled out a handful of different items, "Thumb tack? Carpet tack? Uh, income tack?"

"Ugh, never mind. I'll destroy the Autobots myself!" Lugnut took to the sky, but Wreck-Gar jumped on his back.

"Would you like to try our special of the day?!" Wreck-Gar pulled out the microbot canister that had begun to leak. He read the label, "'Warning: biohazard. Property of Sumdac Systems.' Why that doesn't sound that bad at all." Just then, a small drop of microbots fell on Lugnut's right cybernetic leg.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF MEGATRON?!" Lugnut screamed as he realized he was being eaten, "GET IT OFF ME!"

"Right! Get it OFF _YOU_!" Wreck-Gar pulled out a drill and started to disassemble Lugnut's leg until it snapped right off with Wreck-Gar holding onto it as it plummeted while Lugnut flew wildly with no other leg to stabilize his flight.

"Looks like that takes care of both our problems," Bumblebee smiled.

"Not really," Ratchet said, "If those AllSpark infused microbots could eat through that Decepticon armor…"

"Imagine what they'll do to downtown Detroit…" Sari realized.

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"WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH WOAH! WOAAAH!!! Omph!" Wreck-Gar and Lugnut's leg crash-landed in a pile of garbage on a large scow. Wreck-Gar's legs struggled as his upper torso was trapped in garbage.

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"This demonstration'd better be good," Mayor Edsel's secretary said, "You're approval ratings have plummeted since this sanitation dispute began."

"Um, Mr. Mayor," Powell hurriedly stepped out of his limo, "I'm afraid we've hit a little 'glitch.' We'll have to postpone."

"Wait, is that garbage pile getting _smaller_?" the secretary pointed at a nearby garbage scow. The audience cheered as garbage was devoured by orange microbots. Edsel raised a brow. "Mayor Edsel is impressed Mr. Powell."

"Of course. He should be. Now, does Sumdac Systems have a contract Mr. Mayor?"

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Wreck-Gar finally forced himself free of the garbage. He realized he had a large meatball in his mouth. He chewed it, savored it, then gulped it down. He gave a satisfied expression. Then he heard a sound in the distance. Several people on shore were clapping.

"They _cheer_ for Wreck-Gar!" he gasped, "I am only good for one thing: GARBAGE! Fear not good people! YOUR GARBAGE IS COMING!"

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The Auto-Rover followed the scow above the water using a bridge.

"If that scow hits the shore, it's bye-bye Detroit!" Bumblebee exclaimed.

"We have to stop it!" Sari said.

"No, _I_ have to stop it," Ratchet said, "It was my bad attitude that set this whole thing in motion. So I'm either gonna make it right. Or get eaten by microbots to save everyone." Ratchet ran out of the rover and off the bridge. He slowed down his fall using his magnetizers.

"Wreck-Gar! We need to keep the scow from reaching shore! And hope those microbots don't know how to swim," Ratchet looked down to see the microbots had stopped eating trash and were now eating the boat.

"No! I am Wreck-Gar! I am only good for one thing. GARBAGE!" Wreck-Gar pressed a lever to increase the speed. "I know what I am now. And it's all thanks to you!" Wreck-Gar felt a tear come to his eye.

"Get away from those controls you klutzy moron!" Ratchet used his magnetizer to throw the lever in reverse.

"I am Wreck-Gar! I am a klutzy mor—whoops!" Wreck-Gar purposefully tripped on air and pushed the lever back into high speed and broke it.

"YOU IDIOT! YOU'RE GONNA DESTROY THE WHOLE CITY! YOU WOULDN'T _DARE_ DO ANYTHING _THAT_ STUPID!!!"

"I am Wreck-Gar! I _dare_ to be stupid!" Wreck-Gar's eyes glowed red, "I WILL DESTROY THE WHOLE CITY!" Wreck-Gar jumped in front of Ratchet and stared him down menacingly.

"Alright you! You've forced me to make the _ultimate_ sacrifice. To do the one thing that requires more courage than anything I've ever had to do in my Autobot career. I—!" Ratchet thrust his arm forward, "Apologize…"

"Come again?" Wreck-Gar's eyes turned back to normal.

"I take back every mean thing I said about you. Don't let others tell you what you are. You can be anything you wanna be."

"You mean…I could be…a hero?"

"Yes…" Ratchet smiled, "And you can start by saving this city from being consumed by a swarm of out of control microbots."

"Yes! I am Wreck-Gar! I AM A HERO!" Wreck-Gar shouted to the heavens. He yanked off his Decepticon symbol and slapped on an Autobot insignia. He pulled out a vacuum cleaner, attached it to his backpack, and started to suck up the microbots. He finished sucking them up just as the scow became a floating heap of metal. Wreck-Gar stood proudly until his backpack started to shake and rattle. An orange glow came from inside.

"Thank you!" Wreck-Gar waved before he fell into the lake.

"Wreck-Gar!" Ratchet called. He ran to the edge as a beam of blue light shot upward. "Don't worry kid! I'll pull ya out!" He used his magnetizer to lift him out but only found several scraps of metal. The scow then bumped on the shore.

"Ratchet! You did it! You saved the city!" Bumblebee cheered.

"You're a hero!" Sari agreed.

"He's no hero! He destroyed my microbots!" Powell accused.

"In that case, the mayor refuses to sign your sanitation contract," the secretary said.

"That's it!" Ratchet used some pieces from the scow to lift up the secretary, Edsel, and Powell, "Listen up you bickering babies! Either you settle this garbage dispute HERE AND NOW! Or I dump the lotta ya in the river! GOT IT?!"

"Well, I suppose we can service the malfunctioning trashbots," Powell sighed. The mayor nodded.

"And I suppose we can renew your contract," the secretary said, "With a small increase." Ratchet set them down. They shook hands. Everyone else cheered.

"Whaddya know? They like me. They _really_ like me," Ratchet smiled, "Guess I got a way with words." Sari merely put her head in her hands while Bumblebee slapped his forehead.

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Meanwhile, deep at the bottom of Lake Erie, Wreck-Gar was buried up to his shoulders in sand. His eyes jumped open. He looked around at the fish swimming uncaringly around him.

"Fear not fellow creatures of the deep!" he cheered to them, "I am Wreck-Gar! I am a hero!" He tried to get up but found he was stuck. He struggled with his head and shoulders, but couldn't free himself. "Uhh, excuse me; could one of you lend me a hand? Or a fin? Anybody? Hellooo…"

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AUTHOR'S NOTE: As yet another handwave explanation, the reason Wreck-Gar could lift and throw the armored truck, throw the Angry Archer high into the air, and live underwater is because of his AllSpark fragment. Once again, it might be the easy way out of an explanation, but once again it's all I got. The AllSpark is pretty much my answer to all questions. Eh, whatever.


End file.
